I'm kinda hungry, but I don't feel like getting up yet. It's the kind of feeling you get when you know you're about to feel something, but the impact hasn't come.

So, I just discovered in the past ten minutes through facebook that two more of my friends have gotten married or engaged. It's getting kind of weird to think of all these people in long-term (hopefully everlasting) relationships. Especially since I can remember when one of them was crazy about another guy several years ago. They were practically inseparable for a while. Now she's married to someone else. Of course, I haven't talked to her in several years, nor do I really foresee talking to her again anytime soon. How times have changed.

Not to mention that fact it's kind of creepy to find stuff like that out on Bookface because they posted pictures of it. Hurray for social media?

Perhaps it's just this stage of life, but almost everyone I've had an acquaintance with in high school or college is getting married. If they're not getting married, then they're actively looking for a relationship (or at least complaining about having trouble finding one). It's weird enough to think about friends who are my age or a little younger with families already. Kid(s). A permanent connection to another human being. Weird.

Did I mess up somewhere? I listen to stories about dating and such, but I look back and realize there's not much I can add to the conversation that's not depressing. Or really, there's not much I can add to the conversation at all. I can't empathize with a lot of emotions. Nor do I want to tell stories about what I've seen or done.

Someone said they've known me for several years now, but there are still times when I reveal an interest that surprises them. Am I really that hard to "get to know?" I know I'm not open about a lot of things and I seem to have forgotten how to show mediocre interest. It's always either extreme dislike or excitement. Small talk has always been a terribly weak point, unless I am already very good friends with that person. I just feel like you should have a purpose in a conversation.

I don't really know where this entry is going. Just blogging out loud, I guess. It started with finding out about my friends getting married. Then I started thinking about how some people are always drifting from one relationship to another. It's possible some of these thoughts stem from Nana. Is everyone supposed to drift? If so, then I seriously messed that one up too. From listening to other people's stories, it doesn't sound like there is an instruction manual for any of this. How unfortunate.